


The Hat Family

by Bruh__Moment



Category: A Hat in Time (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-24
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:27:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26089420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bruh__Moment/pseuds/Bruh__Moment
Summary: Snatcher and Hat Lady get into and argument in whoch a time piece gets destroyed. 2 Hat Kids appear from the flash and now theres a feud between whos gonna take care of them.
Relationships: Hat Adult/Snatcher (A Hat in Time)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	1. Mistakes happen...

"Why can't I just have one of these kiddo? I helped you defeat that mustache brat many years ago remember?" Snatcher held up a time pice high above him so the woman couldn't get to it.

"Snatcher! Ugh, Give it to me now!" Hat Lady jumped and grabbed at Snatcher but it was no use. He flies higher every time.

"Kid, let's sign a contract! It's been a long time since you did one of those." Snatcher made a piece of paper appear.

"No!" The lady yelled. "Just give me the damn time piece, your going to drop it!"

"It's not gonna fall Hat Kid! Looks like that brain of yours didn't grow with your body!" Snatcher laughed ather while swinging the time piece hand to hand.

"God dammit Snatcher, Stop!"

"Really kid? A grown woman about to cry- woah!" The time piece fell from his handand smashed right on to thegrass floor. Hat Lady stared in agony as a white flash consumed the area.

After the flash dissapeared, she approached Snatcher.

"You stupid noodle! Ahhh! Stupid!" Hat Lady was hitting, kicking and punching Snatcher, not that it does anything.

"Kiddo, I'm not blue." Snatcher laughed afterwards.

"You stupid idiot! I was supposed to bring that back!"

"Um, kid?" Snatcher pointed behind her.

"What is it?!" Hat Lady turned around and almost fell backwards.

"Wh- wha?" She stared in disbelief as two young children appeared behind her, and it turns out that both fo those children are her.

"I didn't know you had daughters kid, Congrats!"

"Shut up Snatcher!"

"Mommy? Daddy?" One of the smaller children spoke.

"You gotme confused kiddo! Im not your daddy, shes your mommy though!"

Right when he said that both of the kids ran to Hat Lady and pounced on her.

"Mommy!" The smaller one said.

"Ohmygosh mom!" The slightly taller one said while hugging her.

"Both of you get off me!" Hat Lady pushed both of the kids away.

"Now now lady, that's not how you treat your daughters kid!" Snatcher said attempting to annoy her.

"What were you thinking about when you dropped that time piece Snatcher?! WHY ARE THERE 2 OF ME?"

Snatcher tought for a moment before opening his mouth.

"They are your kids, kiddo." Hat Lady just stared at him in disgust. Hwo couls he say such a thing.

"YOU PICTURED US MAKING KIDS?!" Hat Lady yelled at his face while pointing at the 2 girls which were crying.

"No! No! Nothing like that kid! But I'm just saying, since 2 brats appeared to YOUR time piece, you should take care of them."

This was it.

Hat Lady exploded.

She grabbed the 2 girls by the hair and pulled them towards his tree.

"Ow! Ow!! Mom it hurts!" The little one was crying her eyes out while the teen one just went with it.

"They are yours! Just to rewind, YOU DROPPED THE TIME PIECE YOU NOODLE!" Hat Lady yelled at the ghosts face.

"Kid, I think your forgetting who's incharge here!"

"You f-" Hat Lady was cut off.

**"I am tired of being nice with you kid! You either take those 2 brats with you or I'LL MAKE YOUR DEAD CARCASS CARRY THEM!"**

"You don't scare me anymore..." Hat Lady smirks. Snatcher makes the contract appear.

"This contract will decide your fate kid! TAKE IT, SIGN IT, AND LEAVE!." Hat Lady snatches the paper from him to read its contents.

"You are asking me to adopt them?!"

"YES, Look!" Snatcher took the paper from Hat Lady and stamped it.

"See! Now all you have to do is SIGN IT."

_Oh you dumb noodle, you didn't learn from last time..._

"Okay..." Hat Lady took the paper and placed it in her pocket.

"Wait what?! I told you to sign it, not put it away!"

"I'll sign it and bring it to you tommorow." Hat Lady walked away kinda pissed at the whole ordeal.

**"Enjoy your motherhood kid! Hahahahaha!"**

A few minutes after leaving Snatcher's domain, they approach the exit of the forest.

"Mommy, I'm hungry..." The little Hat Kid tucked at her 'mommys' jacket.

"Mommy! Listen to me!" She tugged even harder.

"PECKING, Shut up already! We will be home soon!" Hat Lady exploded on her daughter.

"Don't yell at me..." She started sniffing and tears up.

They were at the spaceship now, Hat Lady was beyond exhausted. She got rid of the pillow pool yeard ago so now, where will the girls sleep?

"Mom! This place looks cool!" The Hat Kid which she assumes is in her teenage years goes to the room.

"You two will sleep in the bed with me. Tommorow I got something to discuss with your father." Hat Lady pointed to the room.

"Wait in the room while I make dinner."

"Mom, I don't think that's how it works." The teen Hat Kid told her mom.

"What doesn't work?"

"Reproduction mom! How did we appear from a human and a ghost?" She tilted her head.

"Ugh! It's a long story okay?" Hat Lady walked to the kitchen. It appears that both Hat Kid's don't know anything about the time piece, they just assume her and Snatcher are their parents.

It really disgusts Hat Lady that one of the Hat Lid's think that she and Snatcher had... Ugh... It made her sick.

Even if she didn't want to, she had to make food for the two girls. Hat Lady didn't love them, but she still felt bad for some reason.

After an hour after dinner, Hat Lady went to sleep with the girls. But the two were still awake, they both got up and grabbed a few pillows that remained from the pillow pool.

They got some cookies from the kitchen and ate them quietly.

"Why does mommy hate us...?" The little Hat Kid whispered to her sister.

"I don't know, we just appeared out of no where. Maybe life chooses she was gonna be our mother. Now go to sleep."

The 2 tried to go to sleep, but they weren't used to the humming of the ship's engines. They tried their best to sleep but they used went to the living room to watch the TV.


	2. Getting closer Pt. 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hat Lady lets her impulse take over her and causes her relationship with Snatcher to change forever

The 3 sat in the kitchen table eating breakfast Hat Lady prepared. It was going to be a busy day for her and Snatcher.

"Mom, can I have more?" The little Hat Kid asked Hat Lady.

"You... You already had enough, ok?" Today is the day she finally names these 2 girls.

"Girls, Today I finally want to name you both." Hat Lady said.

Before she could say anything else the little one started jumping up and down.

"Whats going to be my name? I- I! I want to be Lily! Or hold on! Henni!"

"Just name me whatever you want mom, I don't care."

"Well, I guess you are Henni and... Uh.. Melissa?"

"I guess thats ok." "Yay! My name is Henni! I love you mom!" Henni ran towards her mother and hugged her.

"Ok ok... But you two need to stay on the ship today. Me and Snatcher are going to have a talk about the contract he gave me.

"Go tell him mom!" Henni yelled.

"I'll be on my way soon, Melissa, Look over your sister while Im gone please?" Hat Lady then turned towards the hatch and left.

"Guess Im stuck with you... Ugh." Melissa sighed.

**"WHAT?!, KID! Contracts don't work that way! Don't you remember?!"** Snatcher yelled at Hat Lady, probably because of the contract.

"Yes! You stamped it before I signed it so I altered it, just how I did many years ago." Hat Lady then giggled.

Snatcher was mortified, not only is he now the father of those 2 kids. Hes literally MARRIED to Hat Lady.

"Kid! You have ANY idea what you just did?"

"Yes I do have an idea, WE will take care of these kids." She has the audacity to smirk at him.

"I don't want to marry the Hat Brat!"

"Who said you had to? The contrat doesn't say it either you dork."

She has a point. The contract was to force Hat Lady to take care of the kids her alone.

"I hate you kid." Snatcher turned around to sit on his armchair again."

"And I loooove you Snatchy" She said trying to annoy him.

"You know what? Since you want to be all 'family' or whatever. How about you run some errands?" Snatcher made another contract appear.

"Here you go kid! Go and fix my well again."

Great, she has to go back to the well again. Thankfully, she knows what to do.

"Ok Snatcher, anything for my beautiful _husband..._ " Her voice is starting to get a bit too seductive.

"You're taking it too far kid! Now get out of here and fix my well."

"Fine Snatcher, hmm." She walked away looking behind to see if Snatcher was looking.

_He was looking at her walking away._

But Hat Lady didn't want to be so dirty minded. Snatcher hates her, especially after this.

After returning from the ship, she carried a toolbox in her hand and in the other one a lamp since it was getting dark. She waited until night time since she had make dinner for the girls and put them to sleep...

Since she was going to get wet, Hat Lady decided to wear one of her swimsuits. She knows it shows alot of skin but, no one is around to see.

Snatcher was near eating a poor traveler's soul after he refused to sign the contract. After this he planned to see the how the village is doing. But then he remembered that Hat Lady was unclugging the well.

The well was left like that for years, so the release of water might be too strong. It might hurt or kill her, so he decides to go to the well.

After teleporting to the well, he heard a woman humming. He felt the aura and knew it was Hat Lady.

_"She's probably fine, I don't know why I decided to come he-"_ He cut his toughts off as he looks at Hat Lady. He got behind a tree to watch.

He has never seen her this exposed before. Her bikini matched her skin color, she was literally naked! He tried to look away but he just couldn't resist looking away, its been almost 700 years since hes seen a woman like that... She was showing too much skin!

"KID!" Snatcher yelled at her.

"WHA-Snatcher?! What are you doing here?" Hat Lady tried to cover herself up, she wasn't naked but she didn't want Snatcher to stare at her chest nor her behind!.

"Who do you think you are coming dressed like that?!" Snatcher asked her in an angry tone.

Hat Lady was blushing.

"What kid?" He was blushing too. He flew towards her.

"Kid, I don't know what you are trying to do, but it ain't going to work!" Snatcher syarted to blush even harder.

"Snatcher you um.. Getting too close hehe?" Snatcher backed Hat Lady up to a tree.

"What are you trying to do kid?" Hes trying to keep his anger more visible than the blush.

Hat Lady was so embarrased right now, she felt kind off... Hot.

"Snatcher... Um.."

""Kid, get the hell out of my fore-"

Snatcher was cut off as Hat Lady kissed him right on his mouth. Her warm lips touched his.

He quickly backed away with a blush so bright it could blind.

"Snatcher! God Im! Forgive me... It- It was an impulse! I'm sorry!" Hat Lady sat on the ground praying and begging Snatcher not to kill her.

"Kid, get up." Snatcher pulled her arm and got her close to him again.

"You tell this to anyone, I will take your soul again and never give it back..."

Hat Lady blushed again.

Snatcher felt her warm body push against his.

"KID, LEAVE NOW!" Snatcher pushed her, she ran away.

Snatcher returned to his tree with a blush that won't go away. That damn Hat Brat just kissed him! What is wrong with her?!

Hat Lady was back on her ship, she collapsed on the ground and started crying.

"I'm so dumb! Urgh! Um so stupid!" She slapped her face repeatedly. Why does she always end up ruining friendships due to her dirty impulses?!

She had to keep her whining down so she doesn't wake up the girls.

She will cry herself to sleep.


	3. Getting closer Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hat Lady tries to apologize to Snatcher but it turns into something else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From this chapter forward, Hat Lady and Snatcher are shipped romantically.

A few days have passed since that incident. Hat Lady still regrets kissing Snatcher, today she will try and somehow apologize to him.

Hat Lady sits down on the kitchen table after cleaning the dishes.

"MOM! MELISSA TOOK MY BRACELET!" The high pitched yell of Henni filled the whole ship.

"We had a deal Henni! If I won the card game you would give it to me!" Melissa pulled on Henni's hair and made her squeal.

"AHHHH! MoOOOm!"

"God Dammit! I can't even relaz without you two yelling!" Hat Lady walked into the room and saw Henni crying hysterically on the floor holding her ponytail.

"Mom! She pulled my ponytail and still has my... BRACEE LET!!!" Henni screams at Melissa.

"Why did you pull her hair? Give that back!" Hat Lady pulled Melissa's arm and took the bracelet from her.

"UGH! She made a deal Mom! A dea dis a deal." Melissa scoffs.

"You just don't take people's stuff like that girl, now both of you SHUT IT!" She walked away and rested against tge wall.

"Uhhhhh...." Hat Lady sighs, she can't do this alone.

She stood up and entered the room again so she could get the telescope.

"Girls, Im going to Subcon again ok? Don't fight while Im there." Hat Lady seperates the tripod under the telescope.

"Are you going to see Dad again?" Henni asked.

"Why don't you leave that deadbeat alone? He already left you alone with us." Melissa told her.

Hat Lady ignores them as she teleports to Subcon. Snatcher immidiately feels her soul immiting her aura.

Hat Lady is jumpscared by Snatcher who appeared out of the ground.

"Why are you here!" Snatcher says, acting like what happened a few days ago never happened.

"Snatcher, I... I want to apologize for what happened a few days back." Hat Lady raises her arm to grab his arm. But Snatcher flinches and moves away.

"Kid, I tought you were just a stupid little brat, but now... You're nothing to me kid." Snatcher told to the already crying woman infront of him.

"But! Snatcher! I'm Sorry. I tought by apologizing you would be my BFF again!" Hat Lady falls on her knees and cries.

"You are a pervert kid! I don't like people who go around kissing everyone, you know what they call those people?"

"Just tell me Snatcher..."

"They call them weird kid! You are one, and thanks to you, EVERY subconites makes fun of me because they saw me getting kissed by a half naked HAT BRAT!" Snatcher's hair started to raise.

This is it, this is how she will die. Hat Lady closes her eyes and waits for her death.

"GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!" Besides being embarrased by her, Snatcher still doesn't have the guts to kill her.

Hat Lady did not say anything and ran away crying hysterically.

Snatcher teleported back to his tree to read a book, trying to cool off.

"Oh my dear, things have not been going well for me at all..." Hat Lady says between alot of sobs. She placed a red candle with blue fire as she holds some sort of ring on her fingers.

Hat Lady communicates with her dead husband everytime she is sad, as they both relate, well used too.

"I recently have been thinking of ending it all, you were all I had left... And thanks to me, you suffered and... Died.."

"You and I will forever be married, I'm sorry we could never have children like you wanted..." Hat Lady's eyes looked puffed and red from all of the crying.

"I miss you so much..."

"FORGIVE ME!!!" She yelled, everyone in the forest probably heard it.

"Kid?..." Snatcher peeps through the entrance of the cave.

"Sna- Snatcher?! What do you want..?"

Hat Lady backed up to a wall as Snatcher approached. She looked down.

"Go ahead, insult me again... It's just going to make my demise easier..." Hat Lady stares down as her tears drop.

"I'm sorry kid, I- I'm going to try to cheer you up. I... I can see you were married." Snatcher said.

"Yes, my sweet man. They killed him... I was there but I didn't do anything... I was knocked out." Hat Lady cries even more.

"You, you wanted to have kids? I've never seen you like a girl that would like a family."

"Yes, we tried but then we found out I'm infertile... But he still loved me besides that. That's why I loved him so much..."

Snatcher got an idea.

"Kid... Forgive me..."

He move her head up to meet his eyes...

And then he pressed his lips against hers.

_Her saliva was so warm..._

_Her perfectly curved body was making him go crazy..._

He seperated from her leaving a tiny trail of her saliva.

"I didn't mean what I said earlier kid, Im sorry..." Snatcher said having the hardest blush ever, he could see Hat Lady blushed alot too.

_"Just shut up and keep kissing me..."_ Hat Lady pulled him in for another long, warm and passionate kiss.

Snatcher moved his hands a bit too down... Reaching her hips.

Snatcher pulled in Hat Lady a bit more and both fell on the ground. Snatcher ties up Hat Lady with his tail and keeps assaulting her mouth with kisses.

Snatcher decided to stop when she saw Hat Lady unbottoning her jacket.

He didn't want to go that far...

"Kid, I think we should just keep it at that now..." Snatcher blushes even more at the tought that she wanted him to... You know.

"Okay, I just... I don't know. I love you Snatchy..." She once again kisses him on her mouth.

Hat Lady groaned at the sudden loss of affection since Snatcherlevitated backup.

"Don't tell my Subconites any of this, or I'll have to take your soul again..." Snatcher says while putting the buttons back on her jacket.

"It's ok Snatcher... I won't..." Hat Lady says with a smug face.

"You are always welcome to... Touch me again..." Hat Lady said while caressing his cheek.

"Ok Kid, you can stop it now..." Snatcher levitates away.

This whole event left the poor Hat Lady wanting more... But, she can't force Snatcher to do something he doesn't want to do. She sees this as a second chance to not fuck up their relationship again.


	4. Daddy Daughter Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After playing with Henni with her dolls, Snatcher goes to the beach with her.

"NO! You are not going out dressed like that!" Snatcher yells at Melissa for wearing such revealing clothing.

"So? Mom dresses like this sometimes! Who cares? Melissa yells back at Snatcher. "Also, you're not a good father anyway!"

" **DON'T YOU TALK BACK TO ME YOUNG WOMAN** " Snatcher stood up from his armchair.

"Guys! Stop yelling, it's scary..." Henni sat on the floor hugging her dolls in fear.

"I'm sorry Henni, but your _BRAT_ sister is being a _BRAT_ today!

"Dad! I can go to Mafia Town dressed any way I want to!" Melissa turns to the door. Snatcher feels hes going to lose it again, hes not going to let this brat ruin his day.

"You're not going out dressed like that! PERIOD." Snatcher said that straight to her face.

All she did was roll her eyes.

"What the hell am I supposed to do with Henni?! I don't want to stay with this brat!" Snatcher pointed to Henni.

"Mom left one of those crank box thingy. But it needs fixing." Melissa smirked, she had a plan which would push Snatcher to his limits.

"You have to go inside of it though..." Melissa opened the lid and motion Snatcher to back off. Did that piss Snatcher off...

"I'm going to cave that damn face of your's in if you do that again." Snatcher crawled into the box.

Then he felt something pinch him.

"Ah! What the- Dammit." Snatcher's lower body is stuck inside the box. Melissa laughs at him while she put on earphones.

"Well Dad, I didn't know you were so supid! Haha!" Melissa laughs at her father who is stuck in a box... How pathetic.

"Whatever! Have fun with Henni, Dad!"

Melissa gave Snatcher the finger.

**"You look like a fucking slut Melissa! I swear when I get out of this box Im going to... Grrrrr!"**

"Really? Slut shaming your own daughter? Psst, fuck you Dad! Guess what?! I love it when boys look at me weird!

Melissa walked away.

**"GET THE HELL BACK HERE YOU DAMN BRAT!"** His eyes were flaming blue from his anger.

"Why is Melissa so mean daddy?" Henni looked at Snatcher with puppy eyes.

"Shut up Henni, can't you see Im in a bad mood?" Snatcher tries to pull himself out but with no success.

"If I help you out, can we go to the beach where mommy works?" Henni tilted her head and smiled.

"No! I'm the King of Subcon and no one helps me! I will do it myself. I don't need a brat's help." Snatcher starts pulling violently almost ripping off the wood.

"Okay, I'll just play with my dollies."

"Yes, do that. If you stay quiet for the rest of the morning we will go to the beach with mommy okay?" Snatcher smiles at Henni.

"Okay!" Henni then continued playing with her dolls.

After a few minutes her game was interrupted as Snatcher fell sideways and the box broke apart.

"Yes! Im free!" Snatcher stretched his tail and flew towards Henni.

"Congrats dad! Want to play dolls with me?"

"No"

"Awww... PLEASE...." Henni is giving Snatcher the puppy eyes again, just how Hat Kid used to.

"God damn... Fine. We can play for a bit and then we will go to the beach okay?"

"Yay! Take this one Dad." Henni handed out the pink doll to Snatcher.

"Kid, Why can't I have the blue one? Just give me that one."

"NO!"

"Fine, damn brat. How do we play anyways?" Snatcher already in a bad mood, forced to play something he can't even play.

"The first thing we do is choose our names! Im Henni, who are you?"

"Snatcher..." He was already bored.

"Okay! Let's play house!"

Snatcher sighed "What is it?"

"I'll be the Mommy and the kids, and you will be the daddy!"

"Um! No! Im not your husband you weirdo!" Snatcher was disgusted.

"Dad! It's just a game!" Henni yelled.

"Ugh, kid. I don't want to play this okay? How about we just go to the beach with your mother." Atleast he gets to relax today.

"Fine! Let me just get my swimwear."

After an hour Snatcher and Henni arrive at the beach.

"Kid, go swim around or drown. Just get out of my sight."

"Okay"

Henni went to play with another girl in the water while Snatcher watched them.

"Snatcher there's no reason for you to watch them! That's my job."

That voice, its familiar...

"Kid? Wha-"

Snatcher looked at Hat Lady's direction and saw her in... Very revealing clothing.

"Enjoying the sight Snatcher?" She giggles afterwards.

"Kid, You... Go back to your post!"

"Whatever you tsundere!"


End file.
